The Anchor of My Soul

June 18, 2018

Reflection:

Yesterday, we celebrated Father’s Day at the Church. It’s sad, though because neither my son, Ezekiel nor my husband, Michael was with me during this special occasion. Ezekiel, asked me if he could stay with his grandma, while Michael was still in the middle of the ocean. I don’t know when he’s coming back. So instead of meditating on things that I don’t have I just concentrate on Pastor’s sermon. This was about the anchor of the soul. And the word was found in Hebrews 6:13-20.  God’s promise to Abraham. He said “Surely blessing, I will bless you and multiplying I will multiply you.” And so, after he had patiently endured, he obtained the promise.

“Who is the anchor of your soul? Where are you putting your trust?” Pastor asked, and these questions lead me to this blog.

Where am I putting my trust? Is it on my job? Is it on money? Is it on my sponsor, my husband? my son? religion? As I search deep with in my soul, the Lord reminded me that I cannot put my trust to anybody or anything except Him. He reminded me during those times that I pursue riches and how He made me realized that those things fade away. Gathering material things, power or fame are like gathering sand with your bare hands, that no matter how you hold on to it, it will just slip through your fingers. The more you gather, the more you lose and the more you’re exerting effort to it, the more you’re getting tired but gather only a little. And I remember how many people I’ve hurt before during that pursuit, how many precious time I lose and at the end I ended up to nothing.

Mark 10:24

But Jesus answered again and said to them, “Children, how hard it is for those who trust in riches to enter the kingdom of God”

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Photo by Lynnelle Richardson on Pexels.com

It’s not bad to have riches, it’s not bad to have big dreams, and all the material things, remember King David, he has riches, power and fame but he’s didn’t put his trust to either one of these things. And the bible said that he’s the man after God’s heart. God even gave us the power to create wealth ( Deuteronomy 8). Jesus came so that we might have life and have it more abundantly (John 10:10)

There are a lot of people in our society today, they put their trust in their money, in their power, authority, most of them put trust to people, and other things, sometimes, those things becomes an idol to them, they put those things first and forgot about God, who gave them power, wealth and fame. A lot of people are becoming prideful and trusting themselves too much, thinking that they are now on top because of their own knowledge and strength. I know this because I’ve been there, I was one of these people who will do anything just to get to the top, but I thank God, for His mercy and by His grace, He set me free from that bondage. God made me realized that without Him I can do nothing, and everything that I pursue without Him are nothing.

I want to share these words from Matthew. These words from the Lord, gives me light, hope and sense of security. These words are powerful because it was spoken by the living God. It created great impact and give me a new perspective in life.

Matthew 6:19-21

Lay Up Treasures in Heaven

19 “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust[a] destroy and where thieves break in and steal, 20 but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Matthew 6:24-33

24 “No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money.[a]

Do Not Be Anxious

25 “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26 Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 27 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?[b] 28 And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, 29 yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 30 But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31 Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. 33 But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

Before, I used to worried to much about my job, about the money that I need to earn and to save for the future. And these words from the bible gave me serenity, peace and joy that the Lord will always provides for my needs. And as the Lord slowly changing me, He’s changing my situations. Knowing that God gave His only begotten Son Jesus for the forgiveness of my sins, I believe I can ask of God anything that is according to His will of course and it shall be given unto me as He promised. And when God promised somethings, I am one hundred and one percent sure that He’ll do it because His words never changes, His words are true and He cannot lie. I found hope in Jesus and he is the anchor of my soul. In Him, I put my trust and I will never let go.

I pray for the Holy Spirit of the Lord reveals to you His perfect will. May the Lord reveals Himself to you, keep you and protect you. May Jesus be the anchor of your soul too and found yourself in His light. If you’re in the darkest situation right now, I pray that Jesus’ light come upon you. If you’re in need of financial provision, I pray that Lord God, our Jehovah Jireh be your provider. I speak blessings, promotions, and provisions. I speak revival and deliverance! And may the peace of the Lord guard your heart. In Jesus Name I pray! Amen

 

 

April

pexels-photo-974198.jpegApril is not yet finished but there are lots of things happened already.

First week of April, me and Ezekiel were at the hospital. His wound got infected, his leg was swelling and he was admitted at the hospital for four days. I was touched by those wonderful people who visited us while we we’re at the hospital and those who sent us lovely messages and those who prayed for healing.

Second week of April, my husband came. Just right timing for our son’s third birthday. We celebrated at the old house with our family. Ninong Percy, my cousin Shirley and my auntie Santa. Our things were already packed. We about to move to another place.

Third week of April, we’re in a new place. It was raining when we moved out from our old apartment. And I believe, this is the place where God took me, because He has plans. I don’t know yet but I believe it’s going to be exciting.

Forth week of April, inventory deadline at work. Our inventory team need to reorganize the warehouse and our deadline is on April 30th. If I’ll look at the situation, it’s impossible, but looking with the eyes of faith, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13)

It’s been quite a while since I posted on my blog. It’s hard for me to share my thoughts sometimes, sometimes I cannot find time to write, sometimes it’s the negative thoughts that hinders me from writing, thoughts of what ifs. But then the Lord, reminded me why I am doing this, and for whom am I doing this? It’s not for my own glory or fame, but the credits are to the Lord. How His faithfulness unfolds into my life. How He’s working in me. How the Lord keeps his promises to me. The God who created this whole universe is alive! He is powerful and Almighty. If He can do such miracle in to my life, He can also do it to you.

I am writing and posting this open journal, because I want to tell the whole world how great is our God. To share the lessons that the Lord has taught me, and the lessons that He’s about to teach me. To testify that the promises of God never fails and His love endures forever. And I am hoping and praying that in my simple blog post, it can touch your life, inspire you to believe that God is alive and He can do miracles, He can change every situations and He’s in control. I want to break the bondage of the devil that hinders me to write because I am not a journalist, I am not good in English/grammar, it’s not my line of expertise or whatever lies he want to puts in my brain, negative thoughts that hindering me to share the goodness of the Lord. I believe that if the Lord calls you to do something for His glory and honor, He will enables you, He will equip you, and give you the wisdom to do it.

If you’re still hesitant, cast those negative thoughts away. Because we can do all things through Christ who gives strength (Philippians 4:13)

Isaiah 41:10 New International Version

10 So do not fear, for I am with you;
    do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
    I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

 

God loves you and He wants the best for you.

 

PS. Jesus loves you.

 

My Old Self

FLASHBACK: MY OLD SELF

Looking back, before I knew Jesus, the meaning of life for me was different. I came from a simple middle class family. We’re not poor, we’re not rich either. Ever since I was a child I have this dream of becoming rich; I want to have a big mansion with my family, cars, and I really to be a millionaire someday. I thought that if I will have all the riches in the world, I’ll be happy.  You’ll have a lot of friends, you can go anywhere in the world, you can buy anything that you want, all the latest model of phone, technology and you’ll have power. People will treat you differently if you have money. That’s why I study, finish my college even if I didn’t like my course, I don’t like BS Entrepreneurship but since I thought I don’t have any choice I’ll just grab the opportunity, and if I cannot be employed, I’ll just create employment opportunity. At the early age, I enter into business, selling from pad paper, to tissue, to cosmetics, to apparel. Save money as much as I could. I can say that money was my motivation during those times. I became proud, arrogant, materialistic and workaholic. My ex-boyfriend was one of my business partners. But then it was not a good idea. I won’t tell why. During my college years, I thought that I’m the wealthiest college student on that State University. Relying on my own strength, on my own knowledge, were my ways before.

It didn’t even come to my thoughts that the Lord already planned His actions to reveal to me who He truly is. He let me with my old ways, he just let me work my own way. When I got my job, I became worst. I became more prideful because I was earning more than my dad, and I was the one who’s supporting our youngest sibling’s high school tuition that time. I became boastful, disrespectful towards my dad, and it added up more pressure to him because during those times he didn’t have a job. He made an unwise decision that made him lost his job abroad.  Out of four kids, I can say that I was the most hard headed, hard hearten and the only revel in the family. I learned how to drink liquor and be with the wrong crowd, I got addicted but not on drugs, but on online gaming.

Worse came to worst when I got my credit cards. At first I enjoyed using them because I can get what I want in an instant, and pay later. Little did I know that I was hooked by those credit cards with all the perks and freebies that I can get? It’s like me digging a pit and didn’t know that I was digging a pit for myself. Then one day, I woke up that I was in terrible debt. I thought I was having a nightmare but it was real. My paycheck was no longer enough with all the bills that I need to pay. I can no longer pay for my mortgage so I need to give up the house that we just acquire from Pag-Ibig. I tried hiding my situation to my mom because I knew she’ll get terribly disappointed in me when she found out that I was broke and I had a lot of credit card debts to pay for. So what I did was loaned from a bank, and put myself more in trouble.

I felt depressed, I was so stress, and I wasn’t able to sleep at night about this. Still trying to make it on my own, trying to escape the haunting thoughts, I shifted my thinking on online gaming, and became addicted to it. I lost a lot of weight that time. Every body’s asking what my secret of losing weight is, I just told them problems.

When I can no longer stand the stress, I burst out and cry to my mom. And of course, she was so mad. Ironically speaking, when I was mad with my dad, I didn’t realize that I did the same mistake that my dad did. And my mom was so disappointed. Then there came my dad, telling me “It’s okay, you’re still alive. We have hope as long as we live. Sometimes, we made wrong decisions in life, its okay. Just do your best and get up.” Tears burst down from my eyes.

It’s really a humbling moment for me. Then, I felt the emptiness inside of me. My heart is so empty. I wonder what can fill up the emptiness. Those people who I thought were my friends, left me. And when everything fell apart, when you don’t know where to turn to, that’s the time when I thought of God. When people have problems, I saw them in churches and crying to God. Then the search for Truth began, I’ve been to different churches in the Philippines, Antipolo Church, Kamay ni Hesus, Peñafrancia in Bicol, Groto in Baguio just to name a few but I couldn’t found Him there.

During those moments when God took away everything that I valued, I realized that money was not everything. When you ran out of it, those people who’ll stay should be valued. There is more to life that the pursuit of making money and it only lead to temporary happiness. He’s not yet done removing all the material things I possess, He also sent me in an island where there are no malls, away from the city life that I grew up with, and surround by lots of churches. He sent me in a foreign land, on the end of the Earth literally, far from my family and love ones. I don’t know His plan but since I was drowning in debt, my choices became few.

My auntie who’s in the island of American Samoa, gave me an opportunity and I just grab it rather than to go elsewhere. So I left my city life, I gave up my job, I left my ex-boyfriend (it’s hard for me because I wasn’t sure if he’ll be stay loyal to me… we’ve been 8 years in relationship and we didn’t know if long distance relationship will work. ) a lot of things that I gave up. Well…I cannot point fingers to anyone because after all, I was my entire fault.

With some few dollars on my pocket and almost negative three hundred thousand pesos in debt, I promised to myself that I will get back up again

In my hopeless situation, I found hope in the loving hands of God through Christ Jesus. That Jesus life, death and resurrection is the proof of God’s love towards men. That He gave His life for me so that my sins will be forgiven. It’s far more than a religion but a deeper and more intimate relationship with Him.

If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. (Romans 10:9)

It’s not about what I did, but it’s about the grace of God towards me.

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith–and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God–Ephesians 2:8

September 30, 2012 I made Jesus as my Lord and Savior, repent of my sins and promised to Him from that day, I will never go back from my old self ever again. He taught me that I can only serve one master, God or mammon, and I chose the former than the later. He gave me wisdom that the love of money is the root of all evil. Money is a need but I should not be valued more than God, relationship and a lot of things money cannot buy.

My problems didn’t disappear immediately when I received Jesus, but I had this unspeakable joy and peace in my heart in the midst of trials and hardship. Knowing that God is with me and He has plans for me, not to harm me but to give me hope and the future.

After the entire long search, I found God in this island of American Samoa. Little by little, after three long years, I paid off my debts. He set me free from debt and addiction from online gaming. A lot of things happened that I never thought off, my ex-boyfriend didn’t became my husband, instead I found the man that God gave me here in the island, and gave us an angel. And life has never been the same.
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! 2 Cor. 5:17

Hope my story inspires you, and if you are in the difficult situation right now, God wants you to know that you are not alone, that He loves you just the way you are and He’s willing to help and forgive you. There is hope in Jesus and He is the only one who can fill that empty space in your heart. Just be humble enough to come to Him “God, I cannot do this on my own. I need You. Please show me Your way.” My prayer for you is that may you find your way towards Him and find rest in Him in Jesus name!

To God be the glory!

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Jesus is More Than Enough

food-pot-kitchen-cooking.jpgMarch 25, 2018

Sunday

Our group is the one in charged in cooking for our fellowship today. My friend and I talked about what food we’re going to bring for our fellowship. We talked about her bringing pork, the other lady’s chicken and I am in charge to bring veggies. I don’t know what to cook… to be honest, I am still learning, and I believe I’ll get there someday. I just need a little practice and bringing food at the church is one opportunity to cook for others. I remember my husband taught me how to cook mung bean soup. So, I decided to create an Ilocano style mung bean soup. I added veggies like okra and bitter melon and malunggay leaves to make it healthier.

So before doing my cooking experiment, I asked for the Lord’s guidance to help me cook. I woke up early, so I can prepare and do the cooking while my son was still sleeping. It’s a challenge for me when my husband is not here. I wonder when he’s coming back. I missed him, whenever he’s home and we’re the one in charge of cooking, he’s helping me to cook. But since he’s not here yet, I need to learn to manage my time and do the best I could. I really enjoyed cooking that morning, because it’s so peaceful and I can move with ease because my little monster was asleep.

While cooking, I was wondering if the soup is enough to feed many. On my calculation, it can only feed fifteen people. I was thinking of going to store to buy more ingredients, but I cannot leave my son home alone. So, I just cancel the idea of going to store. I assumed that this will be enough since there are three of us in the group and not only me will bring food.

After done cooking, I gave some to my neighbor and I have a bowl to eat for breakfast with my son. We ate and prepared for church, throw everything in our pick-up truck, buckle up my son, when I received a phone call from my friend, who’s my group mate, reporting that the other lady cannot come. I wasn’t really paying attention to what she’s saying because I am in a rush, we’re getting late for our Purple Book Class and we’re about to leave.

I’m bit worried, I knew this soup was not enough to feed the whole congregation even if my friend come with her pot. Many people will be hungry and what will the people going to say. Hope people understand and still love us after our shortcomings.

I believe that the Lord, already knew what was about to happen. And He has a back-up plan for us to show prove that He is a God of Provision. That in our lacking, there He is to complete. I have peace in my heart, knowing that God shall supply our needs. Then there came this family, with trays of food. It’s their daughter’s 8th birthday! It was unexpected. I didn’t know that the Lord will touch their heart to celebrate with us for they usually do their celebration at home. Hallelujah! I knew the Lord will not let His people get hungry! I was surprised and amazed with God. I praised and thanked the Lord for what He had done!

Truly, the Lord our God is a God of Provision. He provided food for the whole congregation and reminded me a story of Jesus feeding the multitude with just bread and fish and there were still left-over crumbs. After a hearty meal and fellowship, there are a lot of food left, and even the dogs also got their share of this blessing.

Nobody complaint about the mung bean soup I made so I guessed it taste good. What the Lord has done today in our life are scriptures that comes to life.

Matthew 6:25 Jesus said “Therefore I say to you, do not worry about life, what you will eat or what you will drink, not about your body, what will you put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing?”

Matthew 6:32 Jesus said, “For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things.”

Philippians 4:6-7

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving let all your request be made known to God and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:19

And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

I learned a lot of lessons from God today. I knew that there are times I worried too much about things that I missed the blessings of God. There are times that I thought that I wasn’t enough. But through all my shortcomings, there is always a God that provides, that fills in the gap, completing what is lacking and has never ending grace and mercy and so much love to give to each and everyone of us.

Hope this inspire and give you hope. Remember that there is always hope in Jesus. Thank you for reading and God bless you! If you’re in need today, my prayers for you is may the Lord God our Father and Provider blessed you of whatever you need, in Jesus name! Amen

P.S. Jesus loves you.

Reminded by God’s grace…

March 23, 2018

Fridays is one of my favorite day of the week, because not only its TGIF, where most people wants to go to the bar and drink till they drop, I love Fridays because it’s our Youth Night Fellowship. And though it’s challenging at times because of my son, I am still looking forward for this week to attend to our youth ministry. Ministering to youths are exciting, fun, challenging, needs a lot of creativity and adventure and it’s colorful seeing the life of these youths changed by our Lord Jesus. How He’s working in each soul fascinate me. I wonder what will they become when they grow old? Hoping and praying that they’ll be successful in life and that the seeds that we’re planting in their hearts grow and matured and one day, they’ll share what they’ve learned from us and sow seeds to other soul that were lost. They’ll have a lot of journey ahead of them and what we can only do today is to guide, teach them the truth and love them with the love of the Lord. Praying for them that the Lord may keep them and protect them and that they’ll not depart from the Lord.

Looking back at my old self. I once was like them. I can see myself in them. Carefree, sometimes rebel, sometimes reckless, sometimes fearless, sometimes you don’t know where life would take you, emotional, moody and self-reliant and self-sufficient, most of the time know it all. “I know” “I know, right” “I know, I know” these are the common expression you’ll hear from them.

As I looked back sometimes there were thoughts that were coming in the back of my mind that condemned me who I was before. That I am not enough, that my talents, my communication skills and grammar are not good enough. Sometimes there are thoughts that kept me doing what I am doing, hindering word, negative and destructing thought of my past. And when I started entertaining those thoughts, I felt like I am insufficient, I felt weak and unable to face the youth I am ministering, but the Lord is good. When I was attacked by those thoughts, He immediately remind me of His grace, His love, and His promises. And my spirit is strengthened and able to fight back. Knowing God is always on my side, only His name will be magnified. It’s not about me after all, it’s all about Jesus, and how He loved us. Gave up His life, conquer death and give life to those who believe in Him. And being saved by this wonderful grace, what can I do for Him? I cannot just seat there and watch. I must do something. This gift is to wonderful to enjoy only for myself, when He freed me from the bondage, I felt freedom that I’ve never felt before. And I am sharing this to help others, to let them know that there is hope in Jesus. No matter what you’ve been going through, when your world just falls apart, the love of Jesus is there to give us hope, to comfort us and strengthen us. He didn’t promise that there are no hardships, he didn’t say that it’ll be like smooth sailing journey, but He promise not to leave us nor forsake us.

God truly love us.  God demonstrate His own love toward us in that while we were still sinners Christ died for us. (Romans 5:8)

So when Satan reminds me of who I was before, God sure find ways to remind me that His grace is sufficient for me.

Tonight’s topic is on God’s never ending grace and the benefits of His grace.

This open journal is my story with my walk with God and I want to share this to others for inspiration and to share the wonderful love of God and the gift of our salvation through His son Jesus.

To God be all the glory and honor.29251355_1822832191081963_2014498718_o

Photo Credit to : Elaine Que

The Journey Begins

Thanks for joining me!

My name is Elizabeth. my friends call my Beth. I worked as an Asst. Manager at Napa Samoa Inc. (just got promoted) Thank you Lord Jesus for the break through. I have a son, his name is Ezekiel. He’s turning 3 this April. For those mom out there, with a toddler age 2 to 3 maybe they can relate to me, when I share my journey as a mom, my struggles, joy and other  things that a mom can experience. My husband works at the fishing vessel. Most of the time, his not with us. He’ll leave for 30 to 45days and come back in the Island for 2 to 3 weeks.

I love writing on a personal journal. I love recording my experiences, reflecting on the lessons that I’ve learned from the experience. I love sharing the lessons as well. I created this open journal, to share my experiences, gain insights from the comments of those people who are in the same situation and to express myself. I am not a journalist by profession, I just love writing. Sharing an open journal is one of the courageous decisions in my life. It needs courage for a person to share his/her story, it takes courage for a person to admit a shortcoming and mistakes in life, it takes courage for a person to express himself, but everyone has a story to tell, learned lessons to share and as our story unfolds to other people, they can get something out of it. It’s wise to learn from experience of others. And it takes a courageous decision to begin typing and telling a testimony of God’s faithfulness and goodness. This is an open journal of love, hope and testimony of my faith in my Creator. Open journal of my journey and walk with God. It’s how small I am and how great He is.

Hope you join me in my journey. And find His light in every story of my journey.

 

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton

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